Front Row Seats

A few weeks ago Wyatt went to an outreach through Streetwise (a NGO run by dear friends of ours). On a Wednesday night he got to witness their ministry and help out by serving warm meals to attract street boys to come listen to the program that night. Wyatt and the group would be sharing about Jesus, entering into the lives of these guys, and just loving them and affirming them right where they are.

“Street boys” may be a new term for you. It was for us. Think boys, age 6-25, who are homeless living on the streets. Some due to choice, but most due to traumatic life experiences that force this as the only option. Perhaps both of the boy’s parents have died and the relatives don’t want him. Perhaps he failed out of school or didn’t have the funds to continue. Perhaps he’s entangled in a drug or alcohol addiction (many of the guys sniff glue to numb the pain). Perhaps he’s been abused, abandoned, or all of the above. Street boys have a tough life, finding shelter in sewer pipes or on the stoops of storefronts. They rely on begging and foraging, and sometimes stealing, to get enough food for the day and be able to survive. Life is really, really hard. Harder than we can fathom.

We often see these boys/men as they approach our cars at intersections asking for spare change. It’s a complicated situation, one we want to fix immediately, but one that is much more complicated than a meal or a house. What these guys truly need is positive community with work opportunity, and that’s exactly what Streetwise aims to do in a sustainable, empowering way. Not simple fixes or band-aids, but long, slow processes to rescue these street boys from the tough lives they live.

Because of this lifestyle, many guys become hardened. Many guys become addicts. But that doesn’t keep Streetwise from reaching out, from showing up week after week to remind them that they’re not forgotten, that they’re not alone.

When Wyatt went, he met a guy who we’ll call J, who's around 23 years old. J opened up to him a bit and connected with Wyatt. Wyatt simply invited him to our church, a safe place for him to meet others and meet Jesus smack dab in the middle of his hard circumstances. Wyatt came home doubting that J would actually show up to church because he’d have to walk a ways by foot, and because church can be intimidating to others.

But when we arrived at church, we saw J sitting in a chair in the back. He came! Rather than labeling him as an outsider or as a street boy or as homeless, Wyatt and our church family invited him into community. We shook his hand, we treated him with the dignity and respect that he deserves, and Wyatt sat with him for the whole church service. Sometimes we’re afraid to enter in with someone who has a different background than us. Sometimes we’re afraid to get too close. In this season of preparing to leave, it would be easy to just stay at a distance, to pretend that God’s work is limited to our timeframe, and that He’s done for now. But I’m grateful that He pushed us out of that comfort zone and boundary we sometimes fall into, and into a friendship with J.

Because J didn’t just come to church once, he came every single week for the past 4 weeks. One week he mustered up the courage to come sit close to the front with us. He shared about his week and asked about ours. Rather than an outreach or a project, we saw him as our friend, and cared about his heart.

J came to church all cleaned up, clean from drugs, and with a hunger in his heart for something greater. He has been living on the streets off and on since first grade. His uncle and him didn’t get along, so he’s lived a long life fending for himself, but craving a different life. A life with a roof over his head and a job to work hard at.

That week at church, I could just sense that God wanted to do something big in J’s heart. He wasn’t left as an orphan. He has a family through Jesus. He belongs to our family, he belongs to the church, he belongs to Jesus. I can’t even remember the specifics of the sermon preached that Sunday, but I could tell that something was happening in J’s soul. At the end of the sermon, our pastor invited us to pray with him. To accept the redeeming grace offered by the sacrifice of Jesus as He paid the price for our sins and offers us a place in His family.

I couldn’t help but peek. Don’t tell. But when I looked over, I saw J hesitantly raise one arm up over his head. And quickly the other one. Complete surrender to Jesus. Craving. Hungering. Thirsting for His presence and His forgiveness. J was meeting Jesus in that very moment, and silent tears dropped from my eyes.

What have we done to deserve a front row seat to what God is doing? Nothing. What have we done to be a part of this story of redemption in J’s life? Nothing. Yet Jesus allows us to take part in His story. He speaks purpose over the last weeks we’ve spent in Zambia, when all we want to do is skip ahead to the next chapter. But He isn’t limited by our little timelines.

In that moment He wrecked me. He wrecked J. And brought us both to a place of humility and awe at who He is to us.

Every week we’d show up at church I’d be certain that J wouldn’t come. It seemed too good to be true. Yet he kept coming. And this past time we saw J, he was sitting with an elder of our church, with a secondhand bible wrapped in packaging tape. J showed off his Bible to Wyatt, and you could tell it was the most prized possession he’s ever held or seen (bringing a healthy conviction in my own soul). Though he still desires a roof over his head and a steady job, he carries a sense of fulfillment and contentment. Though he lives on the streets, He is not alone. Jesus is with him. Jesus has redeemed his heart. Jesus has brought him out of condemnation into acceptance and adoption.

J isn’t for us to keep to ourselves. He’s not just at our church for us and our purpose. He’s at church for the community, for his family to surround him and care for him. Seeing him sitting with our church elder on one of the last Sundays of time here brought the greatest peace. We’re not abandoning J. And it wasn’t even us that brought J to where he is now. Sure Wyatt invited him, but Jesus carried him. And He will continue to after we leave. We can trust God with J, and we are grateful to pray for him as he continues to grow in his faith.

Never have I met someone who knows contentment, deep soul contentment, as he sleeps on the stoop of a paint store huddling with other street guys in the night for warmth, wandering where he’ll find his food. Everything with that picture seems wrong, and we do pray for his physical provision through God’s purpose. But J knows the deepest satisfaction, beyond shelter, beyond food- the presence of God. The gift of His spirit. The adoption into His family.

J has said yes. Not a cheesy yes, but a risky one. One that forces Him to see the goodness of God for what it is- apart from covered dishes and small group potlucks and youth group retreats and Christian music concerts. One that is raw, intimate, real, life-changing, and forever.

We praise God that He has let us witness Jesus alive in J. Death to life. The most beautiful smile. The most humble heart and eager soul. As he praises with both hands raised in complete surrender, it brings me to complete surrender.

The story redemption stories that God writes in the hearts of His people aren’t isolated, they’re all connected. And as we go back to the States, I pray that we wouldn’t be afraid to talk to the homeless guy or the prostitute or the orphan or the gypsy. Because Jesus’ eye is on them. He desires them. He loves them. He wants them in His family. Who am I to filter? Who am I to keep that gift from them? God’s redemption is for all, and we may just be surprised who He brings our way to be His hands and feet to, to bring them to experience Jesus for themselves.

So rejoice with us today. J is part of an eternal family. Pray for his shelter, for a steady job, for protection from addiction and bad influences on the streets. For community. For the endurance and steadfastness to keep pursuing Jesus even he’s tempted elsewhere. And pray that all of us will have a faith like J’s, which recognizes the riches of His redemption as greater, sweeter, and more prized than any on earth.

4 Things We Want You to Know About Moving Back

We’re moving back to the US two weeks from tomorrow (gulp). We are grateful for those of you who have checked in and are excited for us, and we want to honestly share what this whole deal is like:

1. We aren’t moving home.

“Home” for us, ever since we’ve been married (well, 2 months into the gig), has been Zambia. We traded blenders and china for suitcases and plastic cups on our wedding registry, and built our lives and our marriage in Zambia. Though we’ve traveled back and forth a good bit for fundraising and visits, our home has been here. We know where to grocery shop, how to find the best tomatoes, that we’ll never really get 90% of our mail, the best hospitals/doctors to visit after the fever’s lasted too long, where to find friends (the Deli & church), and places to retreat to after a long day. This is our familiar. Zambia has been our home since January 2014. That may not be a long time to some, but like I said, as a married couple it’s all we’ve known. And for me (Amy) it’s all I’ve known since July 2012. So though we’re moving back to our “home” country, it hasn’t been our home for quite some time, and that’s a hard thing to communicate.

2. It’s not easy.

We made the decision to move back to America for the next couple of years for the best of CiH and our personal lives, but that doesn’t mean it’s all rainbows and ponies. It’s really hard. Words will fall extremely short with this one. Though we’re grateful for y’alls excitement for us, know that it isn’t easy. And we’re really sad to be leaving our home, our friends who have become our family, and our lives here. We would appreciate your sensitivity to this reality, regardless if it makes sense. Sure some days we’ll tell you we’re super excited about Chickfila and “comforts” but the truth is that this is a grieving process, and sometimes we just share the answer we think you want to hear because the correction and honesty hurts a little too much.

3. We don’t have too much to say.

While we’re walking in the thick of a major life transition, dealing with many traumas endured over the last year (or four years), we don’t have many profound things to say. While we’re in the trenches, it’s hard to see the big picture and blog about profound life lessons (not that we did too much before, but you know what I mean). It’s hard to capture emotions in photographs to share with friends and family when we don’t fully understand our own emotions, and when we want to be honest with where we’re at. While the people-pleasing part of me wants to say that I’m sorry for our silence and I’m sorry that it’ll most likely continue, the real part of me really says thank you for giving us our space and our silence. Thank you for praying the words we don’t even know to ask you to pray.

4. We have hope.

All this sounds pretty negative and sad, and as we near our departure date, a lot of days are really sad. But we know that the night doesn’t last forever, that God has a plan. One far greater than I can imagine. One more beautiful than my mind can conceive. Right now in the pits of it, it looks scary and big and daunting. But we have hope. I will hold onto this hope I profess, for He who promised is faithful. He was faithful years ago when He first wrote this verse on my soul, and I KNOW He continues to be, even when my eyes can only see inches in front of me, the scary and sad parts. Thank you to those of you who have been speaking this truth on repeat, who have been walking with us in the ick, and who keep pointing us back to hope. That it will get better. And we know it will. Maybe you’re in a scary place too, a place of hurt, and while I don’t have the answer of the “why” or the “when,” I do believe wholeheartedly that there is a purpose. There is goodness. There is grace. And it. will. get. better. Walk with us today and know you’re not alone in the trenches.

And finally, we want y’all to know that we are thankful for you. For your support throughout this adventure and the one up ahead. God is the same in Zambia as He is in America and we are just as expectant that He is going to reveal His glory and perform miracles through His people. While the current season is pretty heavy and pretty sad, we know that goodness lies ahead, because He is with us and before us. Thank you for praying for us, for encouraging us, and for following us through this next chapter of the Bardi Party.  

We love y’all.

(Wyatt didn't see this tidbit before I published this post, because I wanted it to be a surprise. Though he'll be really humble and probably not admit it, he has been my rock. On our wedding day this was just a pose to make a pretty picture, but now it is real, it is raw, it is beautiful. God's great grace through this man. The love of Jesus shown through a man who does the dishes and the laundry without prompting on the days that I struggle to get moving. A man who listens, who comforts, who lets me process alone, who doesn't quite get a lot of the emotions that I can't express, but who is holding me every step of the way. Thank you Jesus for this man, for my groom.)

Love,

A&W

Updates + The Final Countdown

A lot has happened over the past 2-3 months that we’ve been in Zambia. And I don’t say that in some sort of busy-glorifying way, but rather just a fact. Blogging has taken back seat to other important life issues in this season, and I kinda think that’s okay. But right now we’d love to update y’all on what’s been going on just so you know we’re still alive and kickin.

First off, we are moving back to America on April 13. Now that there’s a date and a booked plane ticket, things are getting pretty real. That’s probably the #1 reason that I haven’t blogged lately. My mind has struggled to keep up with my own life changes I’m experiencing that I struggle to find words to express them and share with you all. So the huge life lessons and testimonials will have to wait for another blog post ;)

How do we feel about it? Probably every emotion possible. Let me just say, it’s not easy y’all. Not even close. So pray for us, and we would be really grateful.

Sometimes I feel like Harvest, sometimes Martha. And sometimes I go from Harvest to Martha within seconds.
Just keepin' it real, folks. 

Now for the updates:

What’s new with CiH?

1. We officially launched the partner class with House of Moses Orphanage/Christian Alliance for Children in Zambia (CACZ) rooted in orphan prevention. See CiH’s blog for more deets on that, but just know how much it has encouraged my soul that Jesus has created this beautiful partnership, one that features the first MAN of CiH classes! 

2. The first loan cycle ended with 100% re-payment rate!! So we just began our second cycle of loans, issued to 12 ladies who are running their own sustainable businesses apart from any dependency on CiH. Teaching 30-50 year old women about profit and cost was never something I saw coming when I was at USC, but I'm so glad I listened in my classes then.

3. Illnesses come and go, but the latest is that Margret is 100% back to normal. Her babies have been sick off and on, but are currently healthy which we are grateful for. The harsh reality of sickness/death is a shocking one here that affects our program and our ladies. One woman cannot come to class on Friday because she has to clean the scene in a neighboring home where a woman died. She said it matter-of-factly, but I remind myself often that it.is.not.okay. 

4. The CiH staff ladies have officially taken over running CiH full-time from a programming standpoint! They even launched a new outreach group in a neighboring compound for women who were begging for an education, for a chance to learn. The sacrificial hearts of our staff will always amaze and inspire me. They stretch their own time and resources to make these outreach programs happen.

5. We’re busy cranking out the new fall line using a top-secret new material to combine with chitenge and some gorgeous new designs AND THE LINE IS AMAZING. Just couldn’t contain that last part, not sorry about it. 

What’s new with us?

1. Well, we’re moving back to America, so lots. We officially decided on RDU area for our new “home” city after reminding ourselves of why we’re coming back. Though we’d love to start a new adventure and be all adventurous, we feel led to lay low, to be faithful in a more “average” life and soak up the conveniences of a familiar place for us and for CiH. It’ll be a strange transition for sure, but we’re excited-scared-ready-sad-happy. When we get back we’ll be looking for a place to move into, cars to drive, a bed to sleep in, and everything else needed for life in America, so if any of y’all have leads on those or would like to help out in any way, we would love to chat!

2. Wyatt is still busy applying for jobs in the RDU area. No leads yet, but plenty of lines out there. Just waiting for that bite, and you’ll surely see an Instagram post of chocolate cake & Coke Zero when that day comes.

3. We’re still in the middle of the legal battle/process, and unfortunately that’s about all we can say about that. Just pray for it.

4. We’re trying to be present here and soak up these last special memories with the friends we’ve made here. The majority of the expat friends will not be here when we plan to move back, so we’re all trying to make the most of the time we have left together. 

Martha's not an expat, but there's a good chance she won't remember me when I'm back. So I'm soaking up all the
one-year-old snuggles and staring contests that I can for now. 

This also means that we’ve gotten to witness and volunteer with some ministries/nonprofits run by some great friends. Here are more deets about them:

            - Water282: Well, we haven’t seen this one in action because we haven't ventured out into the bush recently, but we did live with the founder and his wife, Jacob and Libby Eubanks, and know this organization is legit, and are doing things in a sustainable and beneficial way in Zambia, drilling wells rural villages and providing sanitation education.

            - Impact One Initiative: We participated in a Saturday Reading Clinic (this AM actually!), where we spent time reading to children at a community school in Ng’ombe Compound who don’t otherwise have access to such one-on-one attention. The school has 200 students with 2 teachers, and all children are living in poverty. But the Reading Clinics get them excited about reading, learning, their education and their future. This organization is doing incredible things way beyond this, growing the capacity of community schools in the Ng’ombe Compound, led by the passion and wisdom of a very dear friend of mine, Whitney.

            - Streetwise Co: Wyatt volunteered at an outreach with the rest of our church small group. Streetwise ministers to street children, homeless kids who hustle the streets and sleep in sewer pipes, abandoned cars, storefront stoops, etc. Wyatt helped in serving the kids a hot meal, not for trendy meal serving, but as a gateway to bring in these tough kids/guys to build relationships with them, to let them know that Streetwise is a safe place to learn, to be loved, and to experience Jesus. This people group is incredible under-served and one that wrecks our hearts daily. Streetwise Co. ultimately wants to disciple street kids (guys) by engaging in skills-training in carpentry for them to learn to make a living, to get off the street, and to walk away from addiction and destructive living. Wyatt invited a guy who he met there, J, to come to our church the following Sunday, and he came! He wasn't on drugs, he was eager to know more about Jesus, and said his favorite part of service was worshipping God. How incredible. Pray for J and the redemption and healing happening in his soul. 

            - The Esther School: Based outside Lusaka, about an hour’s drive, these folks are providing high-quality education to village children. The great friends we know there are Americans, but each American teacher has a Zambian co-teacher to encourage community sustainability and to raise up local leadership. Their school buildings, playgrounds, and on-site housing are all built by local craftsmen, providing even more opportunities for the community and building beneficial relationships with them. This ministry is incredible, and the people are amazing. We visited on Valentine’s Day, when we got the grand tour and got to see what we’ve been hearing so much about. The way they run their organization with a local focus is right on point, and really refreshing to see done so well.

These are just a few of the organizations who are doing incredible, sustainable, beneficial work here, but check these out first. We know the founders (aka some of our best friends), we’ve seen their work in action, and we truly respect and believe in how they manage their finances, how they work within communities, how they run their organizations with transparency and integrity, and how bold their hearts are for serving where they’ve been called, no matter how big or small the organization is.

What’s new with Zambia?

1. Rainy season has almost ended, which we thought would bring in cold season just a bit, but it’s staying pretty hot here! I know some of y’all have had your fair share of cold weather, but if you wouldn’t mind sending just an arctic blast this way, we wouldn’t hate it.

2. Lusaka (our hometown) is currently facing fuel shortages, or something of the sort. We hear 50 different stories about the cause or the reality of the “shortage” but here’s what we know to be true: We have to drive around and ask all of our friends if they’ve seen gas at any filling stations, because most are out 99% of the day. And when the petrol truck does come, we race over only to wait in a line for an hour. Some friends have waited 2-3 hours. We don’t know why, really, or when it’ll be over, but it’s pretty bonkers. As if Lusaka city life wasn’t exciting enough ;)

3. Even with the fuel shortages and hot weather and daily challenges, Zambia and its people continue to amaze and inspire us. I think I fall more in love with this country every day (well, most days), and it seems especially so the closer we come to leaving. But it’s not goodbye, it’s see you later!

p.s. I’m obsessed with this photo/lady. Come on… how incredibly stunning and lovely is she?! Her name is Rosemary, and you may just find this photo hanging in my next home.

p.s. again: We’re actually loving eating nshima, probably because we know it won’t be widely accessible in the States, and because it won’t be made by some of our favorite ladies on the face of the earth. And it may cause some digestion issues now, but it’s worth the memories to last us for later.

Wyatt with Joshua & George, Tresa's sons

Amy with Yvonne, a recent graduate of CiH & one fun lady

Love,
A&W

A New Chapter

We’re sorry for the lack of updates on here. Things have been quite busy as we arrived back in Zambia just over a month ago, signed a lease on a new house, and celebrated Valentine’s Day with our ladies & our friends. But I can’t really say that the busyness is why we haven’t been writing as much on here. It’s because we’ve been preparing for a new chapter of life, one we want to share with y’all.

There are a million prayers (well, almost), and a billion emotions behind this one. But we land on excitement, anticipation, and peace as we share with you the next chapter of the #BardiParty: We are moving back to America to be based Stateside for the next couple of years.

Here are the deets (leaving out a ton for time/space sake): After the legal stuff wraps up here, hopefully sometime in mid-April, we’re moving back to the US for a period of time, for the best step for CiH (and our personal lives/marriage/etc.). There are many factors at play, many quite complicated, but the gist of it is that Clothed in Hope needs Stateside support- increased funding, staffing, wholesale/corporate partners, etc.- if we want to continue (and we do!!). And there’s just not anyone who is able to do this right now. So while we’d love to pray someone into existence who could be the voice and hands of CiH Stateside so we can continue living our life here in Zam, we also have to look at the reality of today. There’s a need. There’s an opportunity. So we’re going to walk into it. We’re going to do what some may view as easier, but is actually harder, for us to move back to the US. After all, the only thing we’ve ever known as Mr. and Mrs. is life in Zam- ain’t that crazy?!

We’re obviously sad to say goodbye to the community of church and friends we’ve built over the last year. We’re sad to not get to live daily life with the women and kids at the Chikondi Community Center. But we are grateful for this opportunity, and the women are too. We’re looking big picture for what needs to happen for Clothed in Hope to really reach the place we believe God is calling us to, and this is just a step in the journey. Once we get to a place of Stateside capacity/sustainability, we would love to move back here and pick back up with our lives.

The ladies who run CiH in Zambia now are still killin’ it. And apart from the personal sadness of not getting to be together everyday, they completely understood and were 100% supportive of our decision to move back. Nothing in Zambia will change. I may not have let onto it all along, but we have 6 local staff members who are doing an incredible job. They are really the ones running the program here. And the fact that we’ve come to a place of in-country sustainability, being run 100% by nationals (a dream of many healthy international nonprofits), is amazing. A miracle, really. God is guiding this program. He is growing leaders out of former students. He is igniting change within a community, and it’s far beyond the Bardis, thankfully.

And that’s about it. Nothing tragic, nothing crazy (well, too crazy). Just another step for the #BardiParty in being faithful to where we see God leading. Never a dull moment around here, that’s for sure.

Here’s a little FAQ of things you may be wondering and would like to ask, or are too afraid to ask, or don’t feel like you know us well enough to ask, but would like to know anyways…

1. How long will you be back in the US?

We’re not sure yet. Just taking this thing one step at a time, but praying about 2-3 years.

2. Did something really awful happen that made you guys want to come back?

Nope!

3. Was Zambia life too hard for y’all?

Though it’s challenging, no. We’ve really enjoyed it here!

4. Won’t it be easier to come back to America?

Sure everyday conveniences may make things “easier,” but for us it’ll be a challenging move. One we would appreciate your prayers for. We’ll be transitioning from living in a developing nation, perhaps dealing head-on with all that’s really meant but we haven’t had time to process yet. We built our community and our lives here, and that’s definitely not “easy” to leave.

5. What will y’all do for jobs?

Amy will continue working full-time for CiH, probably traveling a lot to speak, fundraise, network, etc. Wyatt is looking for a full-time job to support our family financially since Amy’s salary won’t be (and hasn’t ever been) enough to support our lives- a choice made so even more money can go directly to the CiH program in Zam right now.

6. What kind of job is Wyatt looking for?

Wyatt would love a (non-support-raised) job related to or in the following fields: youth-related nonprofits, ministry, counseling. He graduated with a Youth Ministry degree from CIU. So if you have any leads, holler at us ;)

7. Where will y’all live?

Great question! We have no idea, and are open to many places in the Southeast depending on where Wyatt is able to find a job. Our top 3 are Charleston, Charlotte, Raleigh/Durham.

8. What will happen to everything in Zambia with CiH?

Nothing and lots of things! Nothing is changing with our programming. If anything, we’re growing, led by the vision and ability of our in-country staff. We’ve got some fun new products and programs in the works for 2015 and they aren’t contingent on our being in Zambia. And that’s a great place to be as an organization.

9. Will you go back in the meantime?

Yes! Amy will be going back every February and September (tentatively, as much as can be planned). Wyatt will join her as his job allows. Read: there might be times when Wyatt can’t come that Amy could bring a group- get excited, y’all!

10. How can we help?

We’re not too sure yet. Right now, helping Wyatt with job leads and such would be huge. That’s the first step. Apart from that, just prayer and lots of it as we walk into much unknown but knowing that Jesus is with us as much in Zam as He will be in the US. We would also love the space to just “be” through this transition, and grace in the silence.

Thank y’all for caring for us, for supporting us, for cheering us on, and for continuing to do all that as we move the #BardiParty from Zam to the US in the next couple of months! We are grateful for y’all, like woah.

Love,

A&W

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ps Thanks to all of y'all who have been praying for and checking in on Margret! She's fully recovered, CT scan normal. Doctors conclude that it was most likely a minor stroke called TIA (yes, really) that could happen again but hopefully won't. She's taking aspirin daily and has a load of prayer warriors behind her, and wanted me to share how she thanks God for each one of you!